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"You are the quantum shaman.  Each of you is The One."
- Orlando

     Perhaps the greatest lure of the Nagual is that it is a mystery which has no explanation and cannot even be discussed with words.  It can only be experienced through the events that define it, yet even the definitions are fleeting as quicksilver.  We cannot confront the Nagual directly, but we may occasionally get glimpses of it from the corner of the third eye, or through Knowledge given to us from our own doubles existing outside of time.

The following is an excerpt from a gnosis-channeling received from Orlando on September 15, 2001, written specifically for Wendy and myself in response to events transpiring in our lives at that time, yet having great relevance for all warriors on the path of heart.

     These fears are going to be the undoing of you if you do not turn and assign names to them, thereby limiting them through your awareness, instead of allowing them to grow like nebulous cancers until they will eventually consume you. The first and greatest fear you face can be assigned the name of Fear itself. Fear of failure or fear of success, fear of finding out you are wrong, but perhaps an even greater fear of facing eternity knowing you were right all along. Fear of being The One because you already Know you are, yet you deny it, because to acknowledge it means accepting onto yourself an awesome responsibility you do not yet feel ready to face. And so I must ask you this: when will you be ready? When will you spread your wings and fly if not now?

And so the second fear is called Eternal and Infinite Responsibility, and requires no further explanation.

The third fear, born of the other two, is fear of the work still ahead, yet what you are failing to grasp is that the avoidance of that work is far more difficult than the work itself, so this leads in a natural progression to the fourth fear, which must be recognized as fear of failure, also assigned the label of Doubt. I hear your dreams, you realize. I have seen you fly. Yet I have also seen you retreat to your dayshine life and fold your wings and pretend you are just a girl in a dream instead of that winged being. And by becoming the girl living in fear, there is a danger that the reality you create could be the death of you. Gods do not live in fear, you see. Only mortals. Who are you?

Ah, this is only one vision of many, so while I Intend you take it to heart, I also hope you to not take it too hard, for it is a seemingly complex conundrum that can be changed with a single thought, one simple decision, and that is to embrace the Whole self wholly, recognizing that these fears are only the trappings of the dream and not the immortal fabric of the dreamer. These fears are simply how the dayshine dream is trying to hold you captive, but never forget that it cannot clip your wings. Only you can do that. And only you can not. Make the decision to be an eternal being, and if you live the decision with Intent, the Doing will take care of itself, yes?

This melancholy you feel is only the tip of an iceberg far more dangerous that the one that sank Titanic. You have come to a point in your journey where you are in constant communion with the non-local web of all Knowledge, yet the Knowledge can be a curse as much as a blessing, which is what you are beginning to feel, even if you do not yet see it fully.

Once the All is known, it can never be unknown again, and so it becomes a terrible burden of unbearable beauty and indescribable pain – watching the world go through the motions of madness, listening to the cries from the asylum, and knowing you are the most powerful being in all the universes, yet completely powerless to intervene in any of it. This is why I have always told you that I do not meddle in the affairs of mortals, you see, for even at times when I have seen them change, the danger and the legacy is that most often they change back to their old selves again, going back to sleep on the razor’s edge of the abyss, and before you know it, they fall in, and then there is no finding them ever again, that sweet taste of their being lingering for only an instant on lips of immortal headstones.

This is what makes me a creator*, you see. (*Orlando’s word for “facilitator” or “ally”). This is what makes me grab at passing souls like scraps of pretty confetti, knowing that even if I awaken them from their slumber, it will be their will that decides the final outcome, and never mine, and so this immortal prince wears his crown only as ornamentation, fully realizing he is the reigning god of the All, yet in control of Absolutely Nothing.

And this is precisely and irrevocably how it must be.  You are the creator of reality.  I am only your eternal servant - for it is the will of the mortal in the Now that decides the path of the heart and Dreams the double... so that this humble servant may then begin Dreaming you.  Creator and created, the dark and the light, the dancer and the dance - no one element any more real than the others, yet you are the source.  You are The One.

We are all only cave paintings on the walls of our individual prisons, the still-wet fingerprints of god. The fear and the awareness is that those fingerprints will always lead back to oneself, and that is a terrible responsibility to face, for it means there is nowhere to turn except to the heart for answers, nowhere to look but to the realm of all possibility for direction, nowhere to go but on a path of your own creation - and in doing so, realizing that all things are possible but only the manifestation of your individual will can force any single event to go through the dynamics of actually occurring.

And yet, thou art god, no? And is it not the will of god that has been touted throughout time and all religions, all systems of knowledge, as the most powerful force in all the scattered universes? What is your pleasure? What is your passion? What is your immortal name? What is your will?


September, 2001
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